Dishes and Adult Rewards


Good morning!

And it is a good one. It’s been a while since I have felt ‘good’ upon rising – but I do today | I feel a stirring in my belly to ‘get things done’ (and this might be helped along the way with an early morning drop off of a much needed hand sander by my bro-in-law | old telephone table overhaul HERE I COME)!

It’s a funny thing for me to think about being an ‘adult’. As an 18 year old (many a year ago now), I distinctly remember my father casually handing me a beer | as he would a mate | and then the shock I felt. He looked at me expectantly, 

| do you not want a beer? |

I did, certainly I did. But what was so weird for me was how I felt. My father realised after a short moment that I was a bit uncomfortable with the situation, as though he picked up on my feeling of being ‘naughty’ for drinking, and he said “You’re an adult now Anni, you can have a beer if you want to”. Simple as that. For him, I was now officially an adult.

| Overnight I went from being a child to an adult.
And as far as I was concerned, that was WEIRD |

That moment has popped in to my head multiple times over the last 13 years, as I’ve had ‘adult’ moments – I still feel like I’m not really an adult, as though I’m pretending. And I have to say, it is not those usual adult tasks and activities | marriage (although that is debatable), children, name changes, buying a house, going on your own family holiday | that has really made me feel like an adult.

No, it has been quiet adult moments within myself, when I have made, what to me are, adult choices. 

Something even as simple as doing the dishes…

I know, unusual activity to draw a sense of age / wisdom / adulthood from? Bear with me.

As a younger person I H.A.T.E.D doing the dishes…and right up until after purchasing my own unit and living by myself…I would often go for days at a time working through the entire kitchen, until I had literally used ALL possible containers without washing any. The resulting brothel of dirty | and oft smelly | containers and plates and mess to clean up was enough to send me running to a friend’s house for breakfast…lunch…and dinner. 

And then I met my man. Who, when allowed to be, was JUST AS BAD, if not WORSE.

| Something had to change |

And so, slowly, ever so slowly, I changed…and grew….and turned in to an adult | by CHOOSING to do the dishes | even when I really didn’t want to.

Now, please don’t get me wrong, I still don’t LIKE doing them, but I know that they are just something that has to be done. And that, I suppose, has been part of my adult moments for me 

| doing what just needs to be done |

What I didn’t count on though, was the peace and tranquility I get when I see the kitchen free of mess and clutter and dirty dishes = the rewards of those adult choices.

I had an adult reward moment this morning as I walked in to my kitchen – peace and tranquility to start the day! 

Enjoy your day!
With love,
x Anni x


 Ssshhhh, they still scare me sometimes…



3 thoughts on “Dishes and Adult Rewards

  1. Billie said to Nina – ‘You’ve been middle-aged since you were 14.’
    I sometimes feel like this myself, like I skipped straight to being the ‘responsible’ one. The one who kept a clean house and was never late for anything. Who paid her bills on time, never took drugs or started smoking. Settled the fights between her friends, ensured she gave adequate time to each of her (divorced) parents etc etc. For me, at 31, it’s a matter of remembering that it’s ok to loosen my grip occasionally, to leave control over to someone else instead of it always having to be up to me. I suppose that also comes with being an adult, doesn’t it? Having the self-awareness to actually see these things and make changes if need be. xo

    • So very true my darling friend – on all accounts.
      You have always been the ‘responsible’ one in our circle of beautiful friends, and within your family, and I’m sure in other areas of your life also. And yes, I believe also that it is just as important for yourself to let go and let someone else look after you, look after others and be responsible.
      However, there is also absolutely nothing wrong with being responsible, and ‘older’ in your actions than others around you – just so long as you have peace within that. I believe that it comes down to personality traits – that you have a strength within you that has always set you as a nurturer of friends, protector of the ‘right’, and a whisperer to those who need a gentle reminder of what is really important in this life.
      This ‘crown’ you wear however does not mean that YOU don’t need looking after, nurturing and protecting – if anything you need it just as much if not more, for it is your language of love
      | you speak it and it needs to be spoken back to you and your heart |
      So I believe part of adulthood for yourself is finding the strength within you to let others look after themselves and YOU, and standing up for that if those you care for are a bit occupied and not looking ‘back’ to their support network enough.

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